A poll released earlier today by the Rockettopia Depressing Polling Organization showed that among f students asked the question "What does the 'Take Back the Night Club' do?", 60% gave an answer involving the control of Raccoons, Coyotes, Opossums, and other nocturnal mammals. The other 40% were divided among the beliefs that it was a crazy project to make the sun shine at night, a counter to daylight savings time, and an advocate for less homework. Only five percent got the correct answer.

The Take Back the Night club is actually about preventing dating violence, conversations about which usually end up at the 'Does that really happen around here?' point. They sometimes do bake sales and other events to raise money and awareness about dating violence. In hindsight, they probably should've seen the branding problem when of most people who came to their events ended up talking about their trash cans being raided.

We here at News from Rockettopia hope that after this article, the number of calls about wild animals every night to the Take Back the Night hotline will drop below ten. And we also hope that everyone who reads this goes to their events.